Disney Starlight: Brightest, Most Over-the-Top Parade in Orlando

There’s a certain kind of madness that descends on Walt Disney World after dark. The sun goes down, the lights come up, and grown adults elbow small children out of the way just for a chance at a decent curbside view. This summer, the level of chaos is set to reach never-before-seen heights as Magic Kingdom unleashes Disney Starlight: Dream the Night Away—the first new nighttime parade in what feels like a century. And, believe me, this is not your grandmother’s light parade.

For starters, Disney’s marketing people are calling it a “constellation of dreams.” I know, it sounds like the sort of phrase you’d expect from someone who spends a lot of time in rooms filled with glitter. But, for once, the hype might actually be justified. This is a parade engineered to yank the maximum amount of awe, nostalgia, and unfiltered joy out of everyone it passes, whether you’re a starry-eyed seven-year-old or a hardened theme park veteran with a thousand FastPasses notched on your belt.

Let’s talk hardware, because this is Disney, and if they can put wheels and LED lights on it, they will. Leading the charge is the Blue Fairy herself, waving a wand and generally showing off with more twinkle than the average Christmas tree farm. She lights up Main Street, sets the tone, and then, like the world’s most punctual traffic warden, ushers in a procession of floats so bright they make Times Square look like a dimly lit back alley.

Next up: Peter Pan and Wendy, soaring over London rooftops in a way that can only be described as illegal in at least nine states. Asha from Disney’s Wish appears, presumably to make everyone under 12 squeal with delight, and then the real party starts. Mirabel and the entire Madrigal clan from Encanto explode onto the scene, butterflies everywhere, enough Colombian flair to make even the street vendors jealous, and yes, we’re now talking about Bruno. Bruno, Isabela, and Mirabel are all in full parade mode, doing their best to make your abuela sob happy tears.

But don’t go thinking this is a simple nostalgia trip. Oh no. Elsa glides past in a shimmering Frozen float that probably costs more than my car, but at least she refrains from freezing Main Street into a hockey rink. Then the royal couples roll in, Aurora, Phillip, Belle and Beast, Cinderella and her perennially confused Prince, gliding by in a parade of glitter that would make a Las Vegas revue blush.

But the real test of any parade is whether it has the power. Enter Miguel from Coco, guitar in hand, riding alongside his neon beast Pepita and strumming up enough magic to raise the dead (or at least awaken the nearest dad napping on a bench). Then, just as you think your eyes have adjusted, Moana makes an entrance. She’s riding a canoe, glowing manta ray in to, thanks to some sort of ultraviolet wizardry that, frankly, makes my LED kitchen lights look embarrassing.

Of course, it all builds up to the big finale: a star-covered, cosmic locomotive named Whimsy. This isn’t just any train; this is a train that winks, dances, and quite possibly dreams of winning “America’s Got Talent.” Out of its sparkling caboose tumble more characters than you can wave a churro at; Goofy, Pluto, Donald, Daisy, Snow White (who for some reason is in a mine cart), Rapunzel in her glowing boat, Aladdin and Jasmine on a flying carpet, and of course, the headliners, Mickey and Minnie, dressed to the nines in costumes that would give Elton John second thoughts.

But what really sets Disney Starlight apart isn’t just the character overload or the blinding wattage. It’s the tech. Every float is stuffed with more innovation than the average Silicon Valley startup; synchronized sound, wireless light shows, costumes that sparkle with every pirouette. The music blends vintage Disney magic with a thumping electronic undercurrent, a soundtrack designed to pry open even the grumpiest heart. And as the floats roll by, the music morphs to match thanks to GPS-triggered speakers that ensure nobody misses a beat. It’s almost as if the whole thing is being controlled by NASA from somewhere deep beneath Cinderella Castle.

And just when you think Disney’s run out of emotional buttons to push, along comes Jiminy Cricket, waving from a perch of swirling stars. If that doesn’t get you right in the nostalgia, check your pulse, because this isn’t just a parade, it’s a direct line to every childhood wish you ever made.

Naturally, there’s also a galaxy of merchandise to drain your wallet. Light-up ears, bubble wands, parade-themed popcorn that looks like it was assembled by unicorns after a particularly wild night out; Disney knows exactly how to make sure you remember this evening long after the credit card bill arrives.

So here’s the bottom line: Disney Starlight is set to be the fastest, brightest, most over-the-top parade in the world. Whether you’re a lifelong fan, a casual visitor, or just someone looking for an excuse to stay up past bedtime, you’ll want to be there when the first float rounds the corner. Because in a world that could always use a little more magic, sometimes all you need is a parade of stars to remind you how to dream the night away.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go reserve a spot. These stars aren’t going to watch themselves.